Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Walk and Fall

I do miss Texas (a lot) but I have to admit that living in Kentucky has its perks... such as Fall! Thanks to my husband for being from this area of the country, I have been able to experience what is like living somewhere that actually has four seasons... very different from my days in Cuiaba (hot is an understatement) and Houston.

I do love Fall... everywhere I look there are different shades of gold an red... explosion of color. The air is crisp and it smells wonderful! If winter could just be cold, without the ice/snow...

Anyway, Ana Maria, Booney and I went on a lovely walk on Monday. I vowed to do it every opportunity I get now since we will not be able to enjoy the outdoors again until next year... I love it, Booney loves it and I think that she inherited my genes when it comes to that, too - which makes me very pleased!!!

I am hoping we get to do a couple of more walks like it this year again...

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In Twenty Some Years...

So... this past weekend we had a family wedding to attend - Darryl's little cousin Becky (FINALLY ahahahah). It was a great time and of course Becky looked beautiful (enthusiastic and very happy)!

We had a great time and Ana Maria actually spent her first night away from home... I did not want to keep her out late and mess her routine - which is our sanity... healthy/rested baby = happy baby in my eyes ;) So she spent the night at her Nana's house and that was SOOOOO weird. I thought I would sleep better because it would be the first time since being back from the hospital that the monitor would be off... but I actually slept worse! Not having her there made the house feel empty... Cheesy, yes... But life really is complete with her now and I honestly cannot remember what it was like before... I missed not seeing her smile at me first thing in the morning - as she usually does when I get her out of her crib...

As I was on my way to get her at my mother-in-law's I rememebered the wedding... and I could not help but think that in twenty some years it could easily be Ana Maria getting married... I know, she is not even one yet and I am already picturing her in her wedding dress!



H-Town

The first weekend of October, Ana Maria and I flew to Houston so she could meet my brother Sil, my friends and re-see Tia Calu.

I must say I was a bit nervous about the trip... It was me, a car seat, a car seat base, carry on luggage, diaper bag, stroller frame, and milk bag... oh yes, and a baby... traveling alone!!! Just the thought of unloading and reloading everything at the security check points at the airport made me sweat... however, I must say that I was pleasantly surprised with my other fellow human beings! People were very helpful and nice to me... totally unexpected and I actually feel kind of ashamed to admit to that. Isn't that the way we should all be?! Nice, helpful, courteous, etc.... anyway, I won't get into where my mind is going now because that is a totally new discussion...

So, H-Town, Houston... it was awesome! Seeing my brother interact with Ana put tears in my eyes! He was total 'teddy' bear with her :) And... Calu... my sister, can't get enough of her... she even woke her up from a nap... I also got to see my great friend Tania who I hadn't seen in years - it was just like old times, when we were 15 years old... and the rest of the group (as Rafa said, with some new additions ahahahah).

I really can't wait to go back to Texas...to visit, but mostly live there!

Oh yes, Ana Maria did wonderful in the plane. It was her second trip in one, and just like her first she was her happy usual self... we just had tiny little incident... diaper explosion that had to be tended to right away... inside a turbulent cabin and all! But we managed ;)







Holy Crap

Has it really been this long since I posted?! Geez... I guess time does fly when you have a newborn at home - along with a husband, dog, job, house, etc that you have to tend to... oh yes, and myself!

Where do I even begin... the past months - wow, almost five since Ana Maria was born - have been the best, craziest, most emotional of my life. The first couple of weeks at home with her were a very difficult yet rewarding experience... I remember thinking, would I ever be able to do the things that I was used to?! Like going potty when I needed to rather than holding until the baby was asleep... It WAS hard... but life truly is a miracle and with each passing day life transforms itself and I find myself "managing" the multitasking rollercoaster ride that is my life. Sure, things could always be better... but right now I could not be happier and thank God for everyone and everything I have.

So... where the heck do I begin though?!

Well, like I said Ana Maria is almost five months now and she is AWESOME. My little Chunky Monkey/Chimichanga/Chumbinho is a great baby - no, really! I don't say it because I am her Mami but because she is...she rarely ever fusses, smiles all the time, watches the world around with great intensity absorbing everything in and is so loving.

Development wise, she is "sturdy". Locks her little legs, and standing up on people seems to be her favorite position right now... She does not roll quite yet though but I am not too worried. We started feeding her cereal one week ago and she seems to like it.. we will do it one more week (this one) before introducing the veggies/fruits! Can you believe that?! Soon enough she will be eating meat like her Mom...

Anyway, I just really wanted to touch base here... there is so much going on... so many events that have happened and that are about to that I want to share here but I guess I will have to do it one at time otherwise this will turn into an never ending post...

More to follow!

Sunday, June 7, 2009

I Am WAY Overdue

Literally... I am way overdue in posting here. Life has gotten somewhat crazy since the last post because my little MUTT has finally arrived!!! Well, let's think in restrospect and think how everything happened from then (last post) until now...

I had my two Dr's appts and they went well - I was promised I would get induced if Ana Maria did not arrive by her due date, May 31st. I was thrilled since I was more than ready to meet her. Let's just say that by the time I had my last Dr's appt, on May 28th, the anxiety level was through the roof. My Mom, Darryl and I all went together and in a way we were ready to be sent directly to the hospital that day - since Ms. Ana Maria had not arrived yet - but no so fast... Instead of getting the "okay" that we all wanted, I actually got to have my membranes stripped by the Dr. HOLY CRAP is all I have to say... I had never felt something that hurt so terrible. And to top it off, it was completely unexpected, too - since my Dr. did not "warn" me about what she was about to do... And thinking back now, I am not even sure if that would have helped any because IT HURT a lot... and because she was in a comical mood, in the end she says "Jana, this was only one finger... imagine what a baby will feel like?!" Hell, what a baby will feel like?! I would not like to know because I am certainly signing up for that epidural. So that was that... I was told that by having my membranes stripped I had a 50% chance of going into labor that same day or within the next 48 hrs or so... so from that point on it was waiting game - ha, hasn't that be the game the entire time?!

Anyway, so after being "traumatized" at the Dr's I started having some contractions that same day... very sporadic though and completely inconsistent - so the hopes that came with the pain were disappearing as the hours went on that Thursday. Friday morning we all woke up at home (Darryl, my Mom and I) and we were on the mindset that we were just not going to wait around for this little girl to arrive. We would go out and do things, so we did. But as fate would have it, of course it did not go that way. The plan was to go see Darryl's Mom and then head to the movie theater. On the way to his Mom's house, "ooohhh, I felt something." I told myself and looked at the clock... driving... ten minutes later, "oh, same thing" - told myself... another ten minutes same feeling, and by the third time I tell Darryl (side note, it takes about 35mts or so for us to get from my house to Darryl Mom's house). And he is like, "Okay we need to start counting." And sure enough the contractions were coming, ten minutes apart on the hour, for over an hour actually. ** THIS STARTED AT 11:25am ** At his Mom's house all eyes were on the clock and on me. The contractions became more frequent, from ten minutes, to seven minutes for hours... then we decided to head to a park to do some walking... and as soon as we started walking they were five minutes apart. Once we made our lap around the lake we all headed back home. Once home I made Darryl wait another hour before we called the Dr (side note, it was 5:30pm at this time) - and so he did. But when Darryl called the Dr on call, he made the "mistake" of saying in the message that my membranes had been stripped the previous day and that things were progressing... So, with that in mind the Dr on call called us back. He asked to speak to me. "SO how are you feeling, how long are the contractions lasting? And you had your membranes stripped? That really should not have happened." Okay, (What I should have told the Dr: Dr, first, I have a really high tolerance for pain - I DO) so my contractions are hurting but they are not unbearable yet and they are lasting 30 secs or so... (and as far as the mebranes, trust me, I had no idea that it was coming but it happened and if you have a problem with that, what can I do?!) "Well, what you are feeling could really just be irritability... a reaction to having your membranes stripped and not be real labor. Wait another hour or two and if things really increase you give me a call back." WHAT THE HECK? But was I surprised? Not at all... unfortunately that is how "medicine" is practiced here in the US: no Dr to patient relationship, and to top it off they are "limited" on what they can do b/c of insurance... Okay, so Darryl, my Mom and I are pissed but what can we do besides wait?! So we do... and for two hours they came but then BAM they are gone! I knew it FALSE ALARM again!!!! But why is my lower back killing me?! From 7:30pm until about 8:30pm that is all I felt... and then.... there they came, with a BANG! The contractions were averaging 3-5 mts apart lasting 45 seconds or more... Darryl was ready to call the Dr at this point and I resisted... I was already so ticked off and traumatized with being sent home for "false alarms" that I wanted to wait two hours or longer if I had to just to make sure that I was not having false labor. But that was not needed... because around 9:25pm as I stood up to walk a bit around the house, it came: the water just dripped out of me in the middle of the living room. "F*** THIS we are going to the hospital right now", that is Darryl said and so we headed to St. Elizabeth.

So, the worst experience of my life began... I was taken to the triage room where I was checked to make sure that it really my water that had broken... twice. And twice, the darn test came back negative. Let me tell you, by this point my contractions were b/t 2-4 mts apart, lasting almost 60 secs... PAIN is not even the word I could use to describe how it felt, it was TORTURE, like having your organs taken from inside out... and then to be examied down there twice without any sort of medicine does not make things any better. BUT the worst part of it all, was having your Dr make the call on what is "really" happening to you over the phone. What kind of BS is that?! The man only knows me by name, he could not even pick me out crowd of two and he is the one calling every single shot on this LABOR process without even taking a look at me?! YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME. I was in pain, banging my hands on the wall, and emotionally distressed because in the back of my mind I just know that the he is going to send me home because he "thinks" I am having "irritability" since the two tests came back negative for my water... even though the hospital Dr is pretty sure that was my water and that I am in labor - and she even felt the baby's head in the birth canal. So this is what I had to endure... When I got to the hospital I was 3.5cm dilated. By the time the second "water test" was done - about 30mts after I arrived there - I was 4cm dilated... if I dilated another .5cm in the next 30mts I would be admitted, if not, the Dr would have me walk for an hour to see if things would progress ("WALK?! I can barely make it as one laying on this bed at this time and this nut job expects me to walk?!") and if by then nothing happens, I would be sent home. I am crying of pain but mostly out of anger, I am cursing every word in English and Portuguese that I know and the next thirty minutes were the longest and worst of my life. But when the nurse came to check me... I was b/t 4.5-5cm dilated, "TELL THAT F**** DR THAT I AM 5CM!!!!!" And so I was admitted and the worst experience of my life was coming to an end.

Once I was admitted to the hospital - sometime b/t 10:30-11:30, I have no idea - I was given a happy juice - some sort of pain medicine until my epidural was ready - and I was in heaven, well, close to it anyway! I must say, that during the entire time the staff at St. E was AWESOMEEEEEEE! I know that if they were the ones calling the shots I would have never endured all that I did because of my Dr. And somehow I am really inclined to believe that they convinced my Dr to admit me - after all, they saw me, they witnessed everything that I went through... I am sure my Dr is a good Dr but not that even that good I doubt he has superpowers to oversee all of his patients without physically being there. Anyway, so that was that... I was given the happy juice, then it was time for my epidural (which was not bad at all) and then it was waiting game (ha, again). Sometime in the middle of the night I was given pitocin (not sure if that is how you spell it or not) to speed things up because I had not gone past 5cm. All I know was that at 5:30am on May 30th the nurse came in and said that due to my rising temperature and the baby's elevated heart rate, my Dr would be at the hospital within 30mts to perform a C-Section on me. Wow, talk about a ton of brick hitting you on your head all of the sudden! "Okay..." That is all I had to say, what else could I say?! My baby and I were in jeopardy so let's get this ball rolling... Called the family - who had just left my room 1 1/2 earlier (which I don't even remember b/c I was long gone due to my happy juice) - to head back to the hospital, said my prayers, took photo of the hubby in his "sterelized" outfit and there I went - to the OR.

Ana Maria was born at 6:18am at a VERY healthy 8.159 lbs (YES - I still can't believe I had such big baby inside of me) and 19 3/4 inches - it brings tears to my eyes just to write this down! SHE IS HERE :) I must say that if there is one thing that my Dr did right during this entire experience was call for the C-Section b/c I just know I would not have been able to deliver such a chub "the natural way." In the end, I did not have to get induced, stripping the mebranes may have had something to do with her arrival and Darryl and I are completely in love with her.

She is literally the BEST baby - better than we could have hoped for. She only cries when she is hungry (which at her size happens more often than not, and she demands more than most newborns do), sleeps like a log and poops and pees perfectly! LOL At this stage that is really all I can hope for :) She has been in this world just over one week and we are learning how to do adapt to each other's needs/demands. Breast feeding was a HUGE challenge in the beginning - I never imagined it would be as painful and difficult - but we are getting better at it. The only issue that we have right now is "supply and demand", so Ana is getting supplement twice a day - at night so we can all have a nice peaceful sleep. Hopefully "my girls" will be producing as much milk as my little chubs needs soon - they better not be this big for nothing, otherwise I have already told Darryl that my perfect boob job may come sooner than we anticipated! LOL At her one week appt this past Friday Ana Maria was back at her birth weight (an amazing thing, since most breastfed babies take about two weeks to reach that goal) and had already grown one inch. She is such a GOOD AND CUTE little monster :)

Life has been great ever since she got here.. challenges yes! But honestly, without them, we would not be able to rejoice the good times. My MOM has been an AMAZING help!!! I honestly don't know where or how I would be without her at this time: healing from major surgery, newborn baby, hormones, etc... I LOVE HER so much and she is head over heels with her little "neta". Darryl has impressed me a lot, too - not to say that I did not think that he would not help but he has adapted to the whole "daddyhood" thing rather fast and has even had the "pleasure" of being pooped on and he took it extremely well, did not say a bad word about it ;)

Life is great at this moment... it could only get better if more of my family was around but soon enough we will be able to enjoy all of this happiness together!

Much love!


Daddy getting ready to meet his little girl


Here she is


With Mami and Daddy for the first time


My Chubs ready for her first bath

Hello, I am all cleaned up!

With Mami - the best feeling in the world

All wrapped up - the way she likes it

My little thinker

With Daddy

So sleepy - ready to go home from the hospital

Booney meeting Ana Maria

With Vo Elza

1 Week Old

Three Generations ;)

The Fam

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Red Devil

Okay... Right now I am a ball of anxiety... it simply just hit me this afternoon and as much as I want to and/or try to "control" it I can't - I just CAN'T! For almost nine months now this is what I have been doing.. and trust me, you ask anyone I know and they will all tell you I am the most impatient person on earth... and to think that I have only now bursted and turned the impatient mode on is quite amazing... so just to somewhat illustrate how I am feeling right now listen to this song: Diablo Rojo - yes, that is how I feel in the inside. I hope I am in no way shape or form hurting Ana Maria... but as Calu firmly believes I am probably giving her this very impatient trait of mine as I type this - impatiently. And of course, being the over analytical ultra emotional person that I have always been (then add the pregnancy hormones on top of that) now I sit here completely questioning why I, all of the sudden, started feeling this way... "Is this a sign of something? Of labor?" NUTS, I know.. but like I said, I just can't control it... However, I must note that this anxiety/impatience feeling has not come b/c I am so OVER being pregnant... quite the opposite. I have had really bad days while nurturing this little mutt inside of me, however I cannot complain b/c for the most part I really had a good/enjoyable pregnancy. And I am fully aware of the fact that I will feel such an empty spot inside of me once she is here -outside of me.. so, I am enjoying every moment of it - even as I literally bounce of my chair right now with a good ole 9 month belly on display... Anyway, enjoy the song b/c it is awesome!

Atualizações

Eu sei que faz mais de dias que era para eu ter colocado este post… mas como podem imaginar estes têm sidos os dias mais corridos e os mais devagares da minha vida!

E depois deste tempo aqui estão as atualizações...

Consulta: foi no dia 7 de maio e tudo foi bem – melhor do que eu esperava. Desde então eu já estou com 1cm de dilatação e 70% do meu cérvix já está “maduro” – ou seja, só faltam 30% para ele chegar ao ponto para trabalho de parto. A médica ficou bem satisfeita com meu progresso. Mas, isto quer dizer que ela venha mais cedo do que o previsto? Não necessariamente, mas meu corpo está se preparando para a chegada dela, o que é bom. A Ana Maria também já está virada com a cabeça para baixo (ainda bem, já que eu tinha medo de ela ser teimosa igual a Mãe dela e resolver nascer sentada) e a melhor parte foi que a Dr. Moore não falou nada sobre meu pélvis ser muito pequeno/apertado... então acho que meu medo de ter cesária não passará a ser mais do que medo – que a Ana Maria chegue de parto normal. Minha próxima consulta será no dia 15 de maio e tomara que tudo continue progredindo e indo bem.

O quarto de neném: finalmente está pronto :o) - graças a minha Mãe maravilhosa e cheia de talentos, e o seu assistente, o futuro Papai, Darryl. Eu estou certa do fato que o gene de creatividade não foi passado para mim – ou que ao menos ele está dormente no meu corpo... Por isto, meu trabalho foi praticamente de supervisora. So fosse por minha Mãe ainda teriam mil e uma coisas de decoração no quarto dela, mas... como supervisei tudo acho que ela não vai perdoar eu ter colocado freios nas idéias dela – ahahahah. Eu espero que a Ana Maria goste de seu primeiro quartinho quando ela ver fotos porque ele foi feito com muito amor e dedicação.

Aviso, esta parte pode conter mais informações do que você gostaria de saber... mas de qualquer forma, já que a maioria de todos querem saber o que está acontecendo... Bom, eu tenho quase certeza que este último domingo eu perdi a camada de mucu protetora que fica entre meu útero e o canal vaginal. Quando este mucu se espele, é um dos sinais que o trabalhao de parto não está muito longe. Quão longe? Está é a pergunta que não se pode responder ao certo. Eu deduzi que dois temas constantes durante toda é gestação é que nunca se sabe nada ao certo e que ela requere ter paciência. De acordo com fontes que pesquisei, quando a gestante perde esta camada, o bebê pode estar horas, dias ou até semanas de nascer... então esta “revelação” não mudou nada do que já sabia – que ela pode chegar a qualquer momento. Entretanto, no mesmo dia eu comecei a ter contrações mais intensas – não as que levam ao trabalho de parto. Foi incômodo, mas não ao ponto que eram insuportáveis...mas de qualquer maneira todos ficamos alertos – o Darryl e minha Mãe estavam crentes de que a Ana Maria chegaria no domingo ou na segunda... mas as contrações pararam sozinhas, e continua grávida. Eu as tenho quase todos dias – as vezes são dolorosas e as vezes não... creio que seja meu corpo se preparando para o “dia D”.

E no mais, é isto mesmo… agora a coisa é conter a ansiedade e termos paciência até ela resolver chegar. O Darryl está mais que pronto para ela estar aqui – aliás, nós todos estamos... mas eu acho que é mais difícil para ele se conter... No fim de tudo, eu estou gravida; eu que sinto ela mexer dentro da minha barriga e quem sente as mudanças no corpo se preparando para a chegada dela. E, creio muito na intuição de Mãe... acho que realmente vou acordar um dia e saber que ela estará chegando... lógico que posso estar completamente errada e seja minha inxperiente ingenuidade falando, mas nunca se sabe. E também, estou apostando nas minhas dores para me avisarem – ahahahah.

Temos mais 16 dias até a data prevista dela chegar… vamos continuar contando!

PS: fotinhas do quarto da Ana Maria estão a baixo.